Where there's smoke there must be fire?
“There may be a great fire in our soul, yet no one ever comes to warm himself at it, and the passers-by see only a wisp of smoke.” ~Vincent van Gogh Growing up, the message that I wasn't good enough was pervasive. In my home, I competed for time and attention with things--music, crafts, other people. To my young, child's heart, this competition was interpreted simply that I was not good enough to merit first place in my mother's eye and time. At school, I learned that attention was earned by being the best, achieving above the expectation. So long as you could stay ahead of the pack academically, even in the artistic merits, you were "good enough". But even then, the pressure to stay at the top, to surpass other's achievements was daunting. By middle school, the pressure to be the best at school was suffocating and oppressive. It wasn't until high school that I gave in, gave up, and succumbed to the idea that I wasn't "good enough". In relati