Taking a step in fear
Earlier this week, my mother called to let me know that there were two possible dates for her shoulder surgery. She has no vehicle and limited transportation options besides me. I take her to almost all of her doctor's appointments, and although I dislike be burdened with it (I have so much on my plate), I have found it is helpful because she is prone to re-diagnosing herself or exaggerating her condition. By taking her when it fits in my busy schedule, I know the truth about her medical condition. This surgery is almost elective; the doctor cannot repair the shoulder but can clean out some bone spurs and inflammation which may (or may not) improve her pain level. The first date was fine; the second is my birthday. "You don't have anything BUT your birthday that day, do you?" This is pretty typical of the relationship and the lack of give and take. There is a very one-sided level of respect many times. I'm not trying to whine; I'm trying to establish the dynam...